The peaks and valleys of living are usually what carry the story of anyone’s journey. As well they might. They are the heart of any drama. But the day-to-day stretches of ordinary happenings are just as real a part even if generally unnoticed.
There are times, however, when even the ordinary imposes its weight, needing us to pay attention. That is what the following poem is trying to say.
I Feel Like Crying
No reason why, as far as I know,
I just need to cry today. Nothing heavy,
But barely brimming tears no one will understand
Who has never had a day like this.
It makes no sense, really.
No loss, no stress, no anger.
Not even feeling sorry for myself –
Just the weight of life, I guess,
Getting me down; and that’s okay
as long as it doesn’t keep me there.
Something is telling me to catch my breath,
To spend a day letting life be what it is,
my self be human, merely overwhelmed with the ordinary.
There are other days I want to laugh
Or wear a smile instead of tears
at the corners of my eyes.
Not often, either one of them,
But when I feel like crying
I need to sort through my self
To try to find the meaning of my tears.
Usually, it is a matter of the heart,
A pile-up of emotions, little ones
I need to name. And when I do
They dissipate like early morning mist.
And that is that. Like a deep breath
Cleansing the lungs. Still, I spend the day
Aware of life’s little burdens
And the toll they take on a heart
Open wide by dreams
of what the world might be
Despite the truth of what it is
And who and how we are.
It helps to know that when I feel like crying
My tears are all about, what else, love.
It has been said that “tears are the oil for the hinges of the heart.” It can only help to know what goes on inside a self, if only because what may be going on outside needs clearer eyes.